Disrespect: A Root Cause of Conflict

So generally speaking, the root cause of conflict in families and anywhere is people feeling disrespected. When you think about it the father might feel unappreciated, here the son or the daughter is coming into the business and changing things so they feel disrespected under-appreciated unimportant and the kids in the family business might feel the same thing dad is not allowing me to have my way he’s micromanaging me or mom if she was the president is micromanaging me and not respecting me so that is the root cause of most conflicts in family and business and in couples. So the most important message is to realize that when we take the time to understand ourselves and the other, we have a lot in common most of us want the same thing we want to feel respected, safe, important, loved in a family and often when we are in conflict we're so angry we're not really listening to the other side we're just thinking about our side but when we take the time to listen to the other and they feel listened to we're able to then get down into what might be more of the underlying conflict often when we're in conflict we're just dealing with this symptoms of the conflict It's not the underlying conflict and the key is to discover what is that underlying conflict and then to deal with it.